and speaking of evil necromancers…

A British woman bought a McDonald’s Happy Meal, left it on her shelf for six months, and it showed not a single trace of mold. Not one.

Clearly, McDonald’s food is immortal. Which means that the secret to physical immortality is not the Philosopher’s Stone or Qin Shi Huang’s Elixir of Immortality or the incantations in the ancient Egyptians’ Pyramid Texts. No, the secret to physical immortality is to consume McDonald’s food in sufficient quantities.

However, I suspect that if you did in fact eat enough McDonald’s burgers to become immortal…

…you’d really wish that you’d hadn’t. Eternity with indigestion sounds unpleasant, after all.

-JM